IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Public health is becoming an urgent issue nowadays. Some argue that governments should create nutrition and food choice laws to improve public health, while others believe that it is a matter of personal choice and responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#health #argue #governments #nutrition #food #choice #laws #matter #responsibility
Health
 issues have recently become a major problem for our society and our top concern, and the government
health
 sector needs to act to address
this
. Some
people
,
however
, disagree with
this
 approach since they believe that it is their option as to what kind of food they will consume.
Due to
 the fact that many
people
 today suffer from diabetes or other illnesses, I do not agree with
this
 statement. In
this
 essay, I'll talk about both of my opinions. First off,
people
 have the freedom to consume whatever they choose. What they will want to eat is a matter of personal preference. Some individuals consume virtually exclusively meat because
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 like eat,
some
Correct word choice
and some
show examples
people
also
, only eat vegetables
Nonetheless
,
due to
 the fact that more individuals in some nations are dying relatively young from
health
 difficulties and eating unhealthily,
health
 issues are currently our society's top worry.
For instance
,
due to
 excessive consumption of unhealthy
foods
, about ten
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the population in my home country suffers from high blood pressure and heart attacks. Government should step in to address these challenges, creating programmes to promote the consumption of healthy
foods
as well as
 legislation to restrict the availability of harmful
foods
. In my conclusion, the government should intervene to prohibit harmful
foods
 and create initiatives to urge
people
 not to consume them, even though some individuals think that consuming certain meals is a matter of personal choice.
Submitted by rubenellaurino on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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