Some people feel that success lies in achieving professional and economic targets, while others say that success lies in spending quality time with family and friends. What is your opinion?

In the modern era,
while
there is an ongoing debate with compelling reasons about feeling
success
lies in achieving professional or
spinding
Correct your spelling
spending
quality
time
with family it leads to intriguing arguments and broadens
Correct article usage
a persion's
show examples
persion's
Correct your spelling
person's
horizon. I totally agreed that
spinding
Correct your spelling
spending
quality
time
with family and
frinds ia
Correct your spelling
friends is
a real
success
, and I am going to put forth my idea in
this
essay. At the
out set
Correct your spelling
outset
show examples
, one of the key factors in my point of view is
Correct word choice
that spinding
show examples
spinding
Correct your spelling
spending
quality
time
with family gives us more happiness and comfortable after work hours.
Moreover
, it must be pointed out that it
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
all family happy not only one
persion
Correct your spelling
person
, and it would
also
make
bridge
Add an article
a bridge
the bridge
show examples
between parents and kids.
Forinstance
Correct your spelling
For instance
, a recent
artecle
Correct your spelling
article
published
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Scientific American
reveald
Correct your spelling
revealed
reveals
that families which spend more
quality
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
together have good health because
this
time
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
stress and
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
a
Correct pronoun usage
them a
show examples
break after work times.
Therefore
, the discourse proved that
spinding
Correct your spelling
spending
quality
time
with family is a good way to
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
in life.
To conclude
, I hold the conclusive proof, which has been
out lined
Correct your spelling
outlined
show examples
above, that supports my thoughts on
spinding
Correct your spelling
spending
quality
time
with family is the real
success
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
achieving professional and economic targets, and
hence
I strongly
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that
familly
Correct your spelling
family
time
is the best
time
in the day because the happiness I feel in
this
time
daily.
Submitted by nouhrasha224 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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