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Band 4.5

Watching a live performance such as a play, concert or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on TV. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#live #performance #play #concert #event #tv
In my opinion, the main and pretty much the only logical argument for the
ban
 could be that
phone
 conversations are often quite noisy and annoying for some
people
.
However
, I’d heavily disagree with that standpoint as crowded, populated
places
 are already pretty loud so one
phone
 call wouldn’t change much. Most
people
 nowadays try to find a
quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
 corner when talking anyways, plus actually enforcing the
ban
 would be extremely hard and plain absurd, as trying to notice
people
 talking over their phones in crowded
places
 is almost impossible. There’s actually a much better solution to the problem which has already been implemented in a lot of different countries – special “silent” zones and wagons in public transport which you could notice in
Moscow
Correct article usage
the Moscow
show examples
 Central Ring metro. These offer calm
places
 for those who are too tired of the constant noise. There’s no hard enforcement for these unlike the suggested bans, but they work just fine as-is. Unlike
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
smoking bans, there are no possible health issues or long-term consequences related to talking on your
phone
 in public
places
 neither for you
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 nor for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others.
Phone
 conversations are a too big part of our lives to
ban
 them outright in public
places
. They are
also
 surely but slowly being replaced by text messengers, as a lot of young
people
 find them much more convenient to use. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 I could say that thankfully,
this
ban
 will likely never happen for the reasons mentioned above, which I think is good.
Such
 weird laws that
ban
 common actions should never be a thing as they will restrict our lives in absurd ways for the comfort of a very small self-entitled group of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Atmosphere
  • Immersion
  • Engaging
  • Memorable
  • Sensory experience
  • Emotional connection
  • Nuances
  • Authenticity
  • Excitement
  • Spontaneous
  • Improvisation
  • Social interaction
  • Convenience
  • High-definition visuals
  • Surround sound
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