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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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whereas
Linking Words
 some people believe that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other
celebrations
Use synonyms
 is just a
waste
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 of
money
Use synonyms
, others suppose that these are necessary for individuals and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will argue both opinions and after
that
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,that
show examples
 I will inform my own opinion. on the one
hand
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,hand
show examples
 some people are sure that spending
money
Use synonyms
 on
celebrations
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 is a
waste
Use synonyms
 of
money
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, they reckon that they can spend that
money
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 on something which is more important.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 I find that it indeed is a
waste
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 of
money
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, I will have fun one day and the other day I will forget everything, and my
money
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 will not be returned to me, as far as I am able to judge I can spend that
money
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 on something that I adore,
for
Linking Words
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 I can purchase me books or clothes or anything that I like.
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 some people suppose that without
celebrations
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 our life would be monotonous. they are sure that we should have fun and we should celebrate
celebrations
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, they suppose that there you can meet your friends and relatives, communicate with them and have
such
Linking Words
 a good time
moreover
Linking Words
 you can make new friends.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
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 celebrating
celebrations
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 can be helpful for waiters, as they will earn
money
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,
also
Linking Words
 it can be a spectacular opportunity for small businesses. in conclusion, without question having fun, making new friends is a great opportunity,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 as far as I am able to judge
majority
Add an article
the majority
show examples
 of
celebrations
Use synonyms
 is just a
waste
Use synonyms
 of
money
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • extravagant
  • frivolous
  • lavish
  • unnecessary
  • excessive
  • consumerism
  • unrealistic
  • social bonds
  • milestones
  • local businesses
  • celebrate
  • memorable
  • nostalgic
  • cherish
  • community
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