IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

People often think about creating an ideal society, but most of the times fail in making this happen. What is your opinion about an ideal society? How can we create an ideal society?

#people #society #times #happen
Living in a modern society, working together in a social group has been a life-or-death element for ages.
Therefore
, working in a group has created a wishing for an ideal soul in each person.
However
, most of which are failed so
this
 essay will identify the meaning of an ideal society and how to create an ideal society. Personally, I think an ideal community can be defined as an association where every individual is self-content and lives healthy and peaceful growth.
This
 is because basically, culture consists of inherently unequal elements. the public is not equal; some are superior to others.
Therefore
, a
vanheel
Correct your spelling
van heel
 life can be identified as a place where individual demands are satisfied.
Likewise
, a perfect activity is mainly contributed by the unification of people's notions.
This
 means
firstly
 all citizens need to have the same purpose, implementation and no indiscrimination.
For instance
, as diagnosed by Mr John's newspaper, they had fathomed 50 countries in the world, most of which are illustrated people want to live an ideal soul. To make it, all of them suggest familiarising people’s demands.
In addition
, individuals may need to meddle with children, education and religion. It affects because three elements impact the core mindset so
this
 solution can be the most suitable elucidation. In the conclusion, a perfect life can be known as satisfying people's demands and it can be built by two methods. In my opinion, I do agree with the appearance of ideal growth but it is not where we need to build, it is exactly the daily life that we always end up with a smile.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: