Many parents are worried about the increasing amount of violence in computer games and TV programmers for children. Is violent entertainment harmful for children? What can be done to solve this problem?

many
parents
argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computer games and tv program
is
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are
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badly
effcted
Correct your spelling
effected
affected
on children .in my opinion
parents
should have to
adust
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adjust
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
time table
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timetable
show examples
for entertainment for children and
i
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I
show examples
will
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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discuss
in
Correct pronoun usage
this in
show examples
further
Add an article
the further
a further
show examples
essay.
firstly
in my point of
view
Add a comma
,view
show examples
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
type of entertainment is badly effected on
children
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children's
show examples
eyes
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
computer games and tv
programm
Correct your spelling
programmes
.
in addition
to much use of
compuer
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computer
computers
is
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it
show examples
mostly effected on
mentlaity
Correct your spelling
mentality
of
kids
parents
shuold
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should
have to make a timetable for
kids
.
furthermore
parents
should have to give time for these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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of activities
as well as
they look
on
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at
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kids
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kids'
kid's
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daily life routine.
secondly
,
i
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I
show examples
think the solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
type of
activitiesis
Correct your spelling
activity is
more
harmfull
Correct your spelling
harmful
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
kids
.
Submitted by maseh12499 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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