For all children, the ability to play a musical instrument is just as important as the ability to read and write.’ How far do you agree with this suggestion? How important is it for a child to learn to play a musical instrument, in your view?

#children #ability #instrument #suggestion #child

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Literacy

Use synonyms

should be key to all minors,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

some people argue that the importance of playing one musical instrument for every child should

also

Linking Words

be as vital as

literacy

Use synonyms

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, in my opinion, I disagree with the argument that playing musical

instruments

Use synonyms

should be given

such

Linking Words

importance

in contrast

Linking Words

education

Use synonyms

. I will go ahead to give some reasons in the essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, learning to play musical

gadget

Fix the agreement mistake

gadgets

show examples

should be given less attention in a minor’s early

education

Use synonyms

as interest and talent are taken into consideration. Some minors are musically talented and have an interest in playing a musical instrument

whereas

Linking Words

others do not.

For instance

Linking Words

, minors who are forced to learn how to play musical

instruments

Use synonyms

are unhappy and stressed.

In addition

Linking Words

, my reason for supporting the argument that less relevance should be placed on playing musical

instruments

Use synonyms

is the fact that reading and wiring are vital for future

education

Use synonyms

. At

this

Linking Words

,stage the child's grammar, vocabulary and writing format

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

key to the transitioning of advanced future

education

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, proficiency is one of the criteria used to measure a country’s advancement.

Finally

Linking Words

, Children should be given a variety of opinions to choose between other curricular activities

such

Linking Words

as sports, drama club, debaters club and music club. Despite being given the options offspring will have the opportunity to build on their talent and develop it into a future career.

For example

Linking Words

, in most countries

minor

Fix the agreement mistake

minors

show examples

who take part in extracurricular activities

such

Linking Words

as playing basketball turn out to be professional basketball players and

also

Linking Words

win scholarship awards. In conclusion,

literacy

Use synonyms

is more important than playing musical

instruments

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, they should provide more options

such

Linking Words

as sports and other activities for children.

Literacy

Use synonyms

should be considered as the stronger pathway

for

Change preposition

show examples

progress and independence.

Submitted by issahakuffo400 on Wed Mar 01 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs, in order to save money. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter, - Give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre - Explain why the sports and leisure centre is important for the local community - Describe the possible effects on local people if the centre closes You should write at least 150 words.
I am writing to express my grave concern about closing our local sport and leisure centre. Please, allow me to elaborate on the situation in detail.
7
band
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that thia would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, the stressful lifestyle of human beings causes negative impacts on their social life and health. Arguments exist about whether sports facilities are the best source for maintaining public health. In contrast, other people believe that it is not appropriate to solely concentrate on sports facilities for improving public health. From my standpoint, I agree with the latter viewpoint and am explaining both aspects in further paragraphs.
7.5
band
You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter • say why he/she would not enjoy going to college • explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her suggest types of jobs that would be suitable for him/her
I'm glad to know you just finished your high school and will start a new journey in your life. I truly understand your concern about the plan and would suggest you find an appropriate job right now.
7.5
band
Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?
In contemporary times, many companies compete with each other by broadcasting numerous advertisements, leading some people to believe that consumers are significantly influenced by these adverts. From my point of view, I disagree with this notion. My supporting reasons, as well as ways to protect citizens from advertisements, will be outlined in the following paragraphs before reaching a conclusion.
7.5
band
Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of job they do. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In today’s fast-paced and ever-changing world, the debate over whether it is better to stick to one type of job throughout one’s lifetime or to switch careers has become increasingly relevant. Both perspectives have their own merits and drawbacks, and individuals’ preferences often depend on their personal values and life goals.

For all children, the ability to play a musical instrument is just as important as the ability to read and write.’ How far do you agree with this suggestion? How important is it for a child to learn to play a musical instrument, in your view?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that thia would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?

Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of job they do. Discuss both views and give your opinion.