IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns ad cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

#growth #shops #towns #ad #cities
In
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
 everyone like
Add an article
a
show examples
new fashion
item
Fix the agreement mistake
items
show examples
. All the things we are looking not buy at
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 places. So people have been choosing online shopping.I agreed that it's reduced the sales of retailers.lets we will discuss
this
 in detail. First of all , In online shopping
everything
Add a comma
,everything
show examples
 we will be getting
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 a website so people
Add a missing verb
do no
show examples
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 need to walk away
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
 many places. As a
results
Correct the article-noun agreement
result
show examples
 each and every
product
Add a comma
,product
show examples
 they
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
like to buy
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
website
Add an article
the website
a website
show examples
. They
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
never looked up other shops in town because of their
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
 in their shopping. Second of all , So
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
vouchers and
redeem
Replace the word
redemption
show examples
 points
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been provided by online sellers. But it is very rare to get in
retail
Add an article
a retail
show examples
 mall . Different types of clothing and
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
 are available rather than the shops.the most important are all sizes which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 difficult to get all sizes in store. In modern technology and transport their getting ordered items too fast. So people were choosing
simple
Correct article usage
the simple
show examples
 and fastest way. In sum , I agree that increasing online sales will havoc
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 city's
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
. As a
results
Correct the article-noun agreement
result
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
so much of shop has been closed
due to
 their profit
lose
Replace the word
loss
show examples
. We are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsible for shoppers.take care of them and support them.
Submitted by selvaselvi06 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: