The graph below shows the unemployment rates in the US and Japan between march 1993 and march 1999

The graph below shows the unemployment rates in the US and Japan between march 1993 and march 1999
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This
line chart depicts the unemployed people ratio in two different countries: the United States and
Japan
in March from 1994 to 1999. It is clear from the graph that, in
this
country a massive number of unemployed workers. Accounting to what is shown,
to
Change preposition
apply
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beginning in
Japan
in the first period a tiny percentage of worker forces by 2.3.After that, the rate
become
Change the verb form
becomes
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increased from 2.5 to 3.5 in three years from March .
Although
a drop in 1996 ,
while
become fluctuate over three years. But between March 1998 and ,1999 the ratio of unemployment increased sharply
at the end
of the period. In other countries the percentage of workers was 7.5 throughout the three years it has become from 7.0 to 5.5. After ,that the proportion drop in 1995 and 1998 was the same level in
Japan
.
To sum up
we could say that between 1998 to 1999
this
country had the same period of unemployment 4.5 in the United States
while
4.4 in
Japan
Submitted by ropaabdullah04 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words japan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Unemployment rate
  • Trend
  • Comparison
  • Period
  • Sharp increase/decrease
  • Correlation
  • Economic policies
  • Technological advancements
  • Global economic conditions
  • Consumer spending
  • Social welfare
  • Public sentiment
  • Predictions
  • Economic strategies
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