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Writing Samples
Band 5

Experts say that music is important to live. Do you agree or disagree?

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Music
Use synonyms
 is an important part of
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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something very present in
people
Use synonyms
's daily lives.
While
Linking Words
 some consider it
vital
Change the adjective
vitally
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 important to help them to increase productivity and perform productivity serves as an accompaniment to perform tasks, and for others
enjo
Correct your spelling
enjoy
 it as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
as it is a hobby. Personally, I I personally believe that
music
Use synonyms
 is essential in our lives, as it connects us to another world.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, when we listen to
music
Use synonyms
 it is a moment of relaxation, either because you have just done something physical like sport or something psychological or mental like studying for many hours in a row. When you put the
music
Use synonyms
 in your ears you only think about disconnecting from your efforts and being with yourself,
that is
Linking Words
 to say,
travelingtravelling
Correct your spelling
traveling travelling
 to another world
while
Linking Words
 it is playing. Once it ends or you take it off, it is as if you were going back to work or to school because the moment the
music
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 has ended you are reconnected to reality. If I were asked : what
music
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 is for a person? From a musician's point of view, I would tell you that
music
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 is not only about notes, rhythm, noise and disconnection.
Firstly
Linking Words
, for a person who plays an instrument and lives
music
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, it is to be on a stage that would be like being in a house, and if
this
Linking Words
 is experienced by a group of musicians who live the same experience, it would be like being in the same house as a family.
Secondly
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, for
people
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 who don't play an instrument but listen to it and enjoy it, it is a way to meet and relate to other
people
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, like
for example
Linking Words
 discotheques and concerts. In these
spaces
Add a comma
,spaces
show examples
 we usually go with friends, but sometimes if you go alone you establish a relationship with the rest of the
people
Use synonyms
 because you are sharing a unique moment and you are in tune with them.
Music
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 is essential for
people
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, sometimes it can be problematic because of lyrics and
music
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 videos, but
still
Add a comma
,still
show examples
 it generates discussions, opinions and arguments to try to improve society. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 I think
music
Use synonyms
 is necessary for
people
Use synonyms
 because it helps them to relate, argue and protest against the unjust.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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