Some people think that competitive sports such as soccer can help to reach cultural interaction among people of different age groups and nationalities, but others think that it would cause problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sports #soccer #interaction #age #groups #nationalities

Some people think that competitive

sports

gain most of the interaction among people

with

Change preposition

show examples

different ages and nationalities,

On the other hand

, others think that these

sports

can cause problems as well.

Additionally

sports

play a major role in increasing the interaction between many individuals. In my opinion,

sports

are very important to build bonds between countries First of all,

sports

can teach us different skills and positive characteristics that would make us better.

In addition

sports

give us an opportunity to learn more about the cultures and traditions of other nations, and

this

can help in having

a firm relations

Correct the article-noun agreement

firm relations

a firm relation

show examples

with other countries.

For example

this

interaction would seriously support some important global issues.

However

, other humans believe that these activities would

make

Verb problem

create

show examples

a huge gap between the territories. To put it differently, fans of a specific

team

may not accept their

team

's failure, so fights might occur.

For instance

, in a soccer game, the fans of the losing

team

had a fight with the winning

team

which

lead

Wrong verb form

led

show examples

to serious problems and injuries.

For

this

reason, various harms can be caused.

To sum up

, competitive

sports

such

as football

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

pros and cons that can harm or benefit the population. I believe that the advantages of the

sports

outweigh the disadvantages.

sports

can make a great cohesion between different nationalities.

Submitted by malak.ayman1 on Mon Mar 06 2023

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task achievement

Provide more specific examples and details to thoroughly support your points. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer picture.

coherence cohesion

Ensure consistency in vocabulary and avoid repetition. Use synonyms and varied sentence structures to maintain the reader's interest.

task achievement

Good coverage of both perspectives, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.

coherence cohesion

Clear and concise conclusion that summarizes the main points and states your own opinion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

222 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that competitive sports such as soccer can help to reach cultural interaction among people of different age groups and nationalities, but others think that it would cause problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and more creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In many cities, problems related to overpopulation are becoming more common. Some governments are now encouraging businesses and individuals to move out of cities to rural areas. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?