Some educationalists say that every child should be taught how to play a musical instrument. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#educationalists #child #instrument

play

Wrong verb form

playing

show examples

a musical

instrument

Fix the agreement mistake

instruments

show examples

inexorably in recent years, there is an opinion that the teaching of playing

musical

Add an article

a musical

show examples

instrument

Fix the agreement mistake

instruments

show examples

should be given to all

children

Although

it can bring a number of benefits to young people, I disagree with

this

view because I think

it’s

unnecessary in many situations. On the one hand, it is beneficial

Change preposition

for

show examples

children

to play an

instrument

. It can inspire young people with a sense of accomplishment and foster their self-esteem. As a child learns to play an

instrument

and become more proficient, they may experience a sense of achievement and boast about their progress.

In addition

children

also

enhance their concentration and discipline

along with

the ability to play an

instrument

For example

, when

children

stand in front of their friends or

crowd

Correct article usage

a crowd

show examples

, if they can read the

interpret

Wrong verb form

interpreted

show examples

sheet music or play an

instrument

, it makes them feel more confident and

want

Change the verb form

wants

show examples

to express their skills.

On the other hand

, I believe

it’s

totally unnecessary.

Firstly

, I would contend that young people embark on learning to play an

instrument

. the enormous cost incurred to cover musical instruments and lessons will put a strain on

parent’s

Fix the agreement mistake

parents’

show examples

coffers leading to

financial

Correct article usage

a financial

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burden

Fix the agreement mistake

burdens

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and

Correct word choice

that

show examples

not every family can afford.

Secondly

, not every child has an interest in or aptitude for music, simultaneously

it’s

important to respect and encourage their individual interests. Every one of

children

has different talents and skills,

therefore

parents should not impose their minds and desires

Change preposition

show examples

those

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

’.

As a result

, caregivers need to support their

children

Change preposition

in practicing

show examples

practicing

Change the spelling

practising

show examples

and learning in the fields that they love to reach their full potential In conclusion, playing a musical

instrument

can support the mental and emotional development of a child.

However

, I think

it’s

unnecessary because a large amount of money

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to afford

and

Correct pronoun usage

it and

show examples

unfits

Wrong verb form

unfit

show examples

for all

children

Submitted by Bravid Nguyen on Tue Mar 07 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some educationalists say that every child should be taught how to play a musical instrument. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful ti individuals and to society. To what extend do you agree or disagree

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel tha manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging.Discuss bothe views and give your opinions. 5.0

In some places, old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is much more convenient to watch a movie on television or computer than buy a ticket and go to the cinema. In the nearest future of the popularity of cinemas will drastically decline. Do you agree or disagree?