Success is often measured by wealth and material possessions. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?
In a materialistic world, nowadays it is becoming increasingly common that
people
can see the
Correct article usage
apply
success
only with property and treasures, such
as cars, yachts, bank accounts or expensive jewelleries
. Change the wording
jewellery
pieces of jewellery
Although
I accept the inconsiderable role of these things
on
Change preposition
in
success
I believe that a person can be successful without these things
as well.
With regarding the opinion of success
, one of the main reasons why most people
think that success
can only be measured by richness or material possessions is that many famous people
, who
almost everyone respects and wants to become like them, have Change the pronoun
whom
such
things
and they always show of
with their luxury lives and it influences to Replace the word
off
people
’s thoughts about success
. For example
, we can see on social medias
that Ilon Mask who is considered to be Correct your spelling
media
successful
person is always seen with his wealth and luxuries. Add an article
a successful
Furthermore
, many people
who are not in good condition, cannot afford these sorts of things
and they feel themselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
like
unsuccessfulChange preposition
apply
,
so Remove the comma
apply
that
they automatically connect the accomplishment with prosperity and material belongings.
From my point of view, to be successful in Correct word choice
apply
life
it
is not enough Correct pronoun usage
apply
being
wealthy and well-conditioned. Since it is proven by Change the verb form
to be
majority
of sciences that being grateful and convent with what we have is Add an article
the majority
best
way to feel Change the article
the best
happiness
and it will help everyone without any difficulties. Replace the word
happy
Furthermore
, another important indicate
of achievement is to have Replace the word
indicator
wealthy
relationship in Add an article
a wealthy
life
for each individuals
. Change to a singular noun
individual
For example
, it is hard to imagine that someone who has absolutely
lonely soul can achieve something great.
Add an article
an absolutely
To sum up
, I cannot ignore that property and material belongings play Add an article
a role
the role
role
Fix the agreement mistake
roles
for
happiness, I believe that Change preposition
in
people
can achieve their
happy Change the word
a
life
being
satisfied and confident in their Change preposition
by being
life
.Submitted by feya9104 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite