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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #report #consumption #energy #usa #projections #summaries #features #comparisons
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When linear graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 the
usage
Use synonyms
 of different kind of energy sources in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 from 1980 to 2030.
In
Change preposition
Overall
show examples
overall
Linking Words
 ,all most all the
power
Use synonyms
 sources will have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased in 2030 except
hydropower
Use synonyms
usage
Use synonyms
 of Petroleum fuel will be the stayed as the highest consuming energy method from the beginning to the end of
predicted
Add an article
the predicted
show examples
 period and
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 one will be
hydropower
Use synonyms
. Consumption of petroleum and oil was 35
quadrillion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
 in 1980 and will have an
upword
Correct your spelling
upward
 trend until the end of the predicted time (more than 45
quadrillion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
) Coal
also
Linking Words
 will have been
showed
Change the verb form
showing
shown
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 more or less similar increment with several fluctuations
while
Linking Words
 natural gas was slightly climbed by five
quadrillion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
 between 1980 to 2015 and will have a plateau until 2030.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
usage
Use synonyms
 of all three
power
Use synonyms
 sources named
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
nuclear, solar or wind
power
Use synonyms
 and
hydropower
Use synonyms
 were kept under 5
quadrillion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each and will have been
remain
Change the verb form
remaining
remained
show examples
 under 10 quarterly
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
units
Use synonyms
 up to 2030. Both nuclear ,solar and wind
power
Use synonyms
 will have been
showed
Change the verb form
showing
shown
show examples
 a marginal rise
while
Linking Words
usage
Use synonyms
 of
hydropower
Use synonyms
remain
Change the verb form
remains
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
.
Submitted by madhuherath.manny on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words usage, power, hydropower, quadrillion, units with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remain" was used 2 times.
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