The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full time work did after leaving college in 2008.

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full time work did after leaving college in 2008.
The bar charts illustrate what
graduate
and postgraduate
students
have done after finishing
collage
Correct your spelling
college
show examples
in 2008 in England
also
, that these
students
did not go into
a full-time jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
a full-time job
full-time jobs
show examples
.
Firstly
, both
graduate
and postgraduate
students
went to
further
study which got the highest
number
of
students
in the year 2008, but the
number
of
graduate
students
was much bigger than the postgraduate, it is 29,665.
Furthermore
, part-time
work
comes in second place for postgraduate
students
at 2,535, followed by unemployment at 1,625.
In addition
to voluntary
work
had the lowest
number
of postgraduate
students
, that was 345.
Consequently
, the
number
of graduates
students
that attended part-time
work
or were not employed is almost the same 17,735 and 16,235 there is a small difference.
Lastly
, we have voluntary
work
got
also
the
Add a missing verb
has the
show examples
least count of
graduate
students
3,500. In conclusion,
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
further
study was the highest proportion in both groups and the lowest one was the voluntary
work
.
Submitted by dialamustafaalwais on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, further".
Vocabulary: Replace the words graduate, students, number, work with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.

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