The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full time work did after leaving college in 2008.

#show #uk #graduate #students #time #work #college

The bar charts show data about UK

graduate

Fix the agreement mistake

graduates

show examples

and postgraduate persons

which

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

did not go

Change preposition

to full

show examples

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

work

next leaving university in 2008. In 2008, UK graduate and postgraduate students indicated four types

Change preposition

of level

show examples

level

Fix the agreement mistake

levels

show examples

, namely

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

work

voluntray

Correct your spelling

voluntary

work

further

study

unemployment. The bar charts compare two

differents

Correct your spelling

different

show examples

grade

Fix the agreement mistake

grades

show examples

education

Add an article

the education

show examples

field. Each

charts

Change to a singular noun

chart

show examples

had shown

further

study

and

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

work

quantity reached a peak.

Eventually

Add a comma

,Eventually

show examples

voluntary

work

had

Change the article

the

show examples

same number because plenty of students need for living costs so

this

causing was illustrated

voluntry

Correct your spelling

voluntary

work

rate will be

gradually

Replace the word

graded

show examples

down. In 2008,

number

Change the article

a number

the number

show examples

of graduates

were

Correct pronoun usage

who were

show examples

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

work

and

further

study

nearly 17735 and 29665 respectively. Meantime voluntary

work

pupils were 3500,

also

unemployment

Correct article usage

the unemployment

show examples

number had been 16235 in 2008.

On the other

hand

Add a comma

,hand

show examples

postgradautes

Correct your spelling

postgraduates

had

big

Add an article

a big

show examples

difference in

further

Add an article

the further

show examples

study

this

hit a peak and

been

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

2725,

nevertheless

voluntary

work

hit a low and was 345 but

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

work

and unemployment

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

reached

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

attitude

Correct your spelling

altitude

show examples

thus

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

2535 and 1625 respectively.

Submitted by vasif.askerlii on Fri Mar 10 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words time, work, study with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.

▼

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

170 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full time work did after leaving college in 2008.

Children over 15 years should be allowed to take their own decision without any interference from their parents? Do you agree or disagree.

some countries invest a significant amount of money in promoting the use of bicycles. why do you think this is the case? Does it have a positive or a negative impact on individuals and the society?

Putting criminals into prisons is not an effective way to deal with them. Instead, education and job training should be offered. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people work from home using modern technology today. Some people think that only the workers benefit from this and not the employers. Do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?