In some countries, many people choose to educate children at home by themselves instead of sending them to school. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Education nowadays plays an important role in modern society. It is common to see parents sending their children to school
instead
of tuition at home. Some people believe that kids should be educated in an academic institution Linking Words
while
others oppose that they should be coached at their house. From my point of view, Linking Words
although
home-based tutelage has some advantages to a certain extent, it has more negative impacts on the next generation.
Obviously, there is no denying that private tutoring is beneficial in several aspects. Linking Words
Firstly
, a child can avoid a plethora of cases of accidents both outdoors and in school (bullying). Linking Words
For instance
, some students after becoming victims of bullying decided to be trained at home but they still can go to college with flying colours. It is strong evidence of the effects of individual guidance that the government and educational ministry need to recognize. Linking Words
Besides
, a personal teacher allows both adults and juniors to choose their flexible timetables. If their father or mother has to spend their time solving their work, they can teach their child in the evening after accomplishing their deadline.
Linking Words
However
, the aforementioned merits quite pale in comparison with the drawbacks it may bring. First and foremost there is no better than the public institution where offspring learn how to interact with each other. As an illustration, a youngster guided by his own coach tends to be shy and lack confidence in front of a crowd. Linking Words
As a result
, Linking Words
this
makes him feel difficult to communicate and socialize with Linking Words
each
Correct determiner usage
apply
other
. Fix the agreement mistake
others
In other words
, they will be insufficient in almost fundamental soft skills Linking Words
such
as teamwork, problem-solving Linking Words
or
time management etc. Correct word choice
apply
Moreover
, young people studying privately do not receive official documents, taking authority's certificates or degrees as an example. Linking Words
Consequently
, there is a multitude of obstacles to the future career path.
In conclusion, despite some conveniences mentioned above, homeschooling has apparent negative impacts on learners. Linking Words
Hence
, political leaders should ratify some proper policies to limit Linking Words
this
trend.Linking Words
Submitted by giainhu123 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Response
Your essay does not fully address the prompt and lacks a clear position on whether the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages. Make sure to present a clear argument and support it with relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall structure of the essay is somewhat disorganized and lacks coherence. Work on creating clearer topic sentences and transitions between ideas to improve the flow of your essay.