In some countries, many people choose to educate children at home by themselves instead of sending them to school. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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Education nowadays plays an important role in modern society. It is common to see parents sending their children to school
instead
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of tuition at home. Some people believe that kids should be educated in an academic institution
while
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others oppose that they should be coached at their house. From my point of view,
although
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home-based tutelage has some advantages to a certain extent, it has more negative impacts on the next generation. Obviously, there is no denying that private tutoring is beneficial in several aspects.
Firstly
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, a child can avoid a plethora of cases of accidents both outdoors and in school (bullying).
For instance
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, some students after becoming victims of bullying decided to be trained at home but they still can go to college with flying colours. It is strong evidence of the effects of individual guidance that the government and educational ministry need to recognize.
Besides
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, a personal teacher allows both adults and juniors to choose their flexible timetables. If their father or mother has to spend their time solving their work, they can teach their child in the evening after accomplishing their deadline.
However
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, the aforementioned merits quite pale in comparison with the drawbacks it may bring. First and foremost there is no better than the public institution where offspring learn how to interact with each other. As an illustration, a youngster guided by his own coach tends to be shy and lack confidence in front of a crowd.
As a result
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,
this
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makes him feel difficult to communicate and socialize with
each
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apply
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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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.
In other words
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, they will be insufficient in almost fundamental soft skills
such
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as teamwork, problem-solving
or
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apply
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time management etc.
Moreover
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, young people studying privately do not receive official documents, taking authority's certificates or degrees as an example.
Consequently
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, there is a multitude of obstacles to the future career path. In conclusion, despite some conveniences mentioned above, homeschooling has apparent negative impacts on learners.
Hence
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, political leaders should ratify some proper policies to limit
this
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trend.
Submitted by giainhu123 on

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Task Response
Your essay does not fully address the prompt and lacks a clear position on whether the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages. Make sure to present a clear argument and support it with relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall structure of the essay is somewhat disorganized and lacks coherence. Work on creating clearer topic sentences and transitions between ideas to improve the flow of your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • tailor-made curriculum
  • individual learning pace
  • collaborative learning
  • social and emotional development
  • educational resources
  • extracurricular activities
  • learning environment
  • real-world experiences
  • schedule flexibility
  • academic qualifications
  • peer interactions
  • family relationships
  • homeschooling
  • customized education
  • traditional schooling
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