The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.

#line #visits #uk #bar #countries #residents

The line graph gives information about

travels

Fix the agreement mistake

travel

show examples

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the

between 1979 and 1999 and the bar graph illustrates the most famous states travelled

Change preposition

to by

show examples

inhabitats

Correct your spelling

inhabitants

in 1999 It is

clearly

Replace the word

clear

show examples

that in 1979

Correct article usage

the UK

show examples

populations

hade

Correct your spelling

had

show examples

significantly increase

Change preposition

show examples

visits

abroud

Correct your spelling

abroad

countries

However

a decade ago

resident

Fix the agreement mistake

residents

show examples

Correct article usage

the UK

show examples

population was not

journey

Add an article

a journey

show examples

another

Replace the adjective

another country

other countries

show examples

countries

Also

many

countries

humans hade visited

such

Turkey

, Greece, USA, Spain,

France

Most

Add an article

The most

show examples

important thing

this

Add a missing verb

is this

show examples

graph so

France

Change noun form

France's

show examples

populations are high level in all

countries

Although

Turkey

people are at least

percentage

Correct article usage

a percentage

show examples

whole of states.

Firstly

residents

Correct pronoun usage

who go

show examples

Wrong verb form

going

show examples

to overseas

countries

gain

Wrong verb form

gained

show examples

huge

Correct article usage

a huge

show examples

pie in 1979,

also

overseas

Correct article usage

the overseas

show examples

population

travel

Wrong verb form

travelling

show examples

Correct article usage

the UK

show examples

suddenly

to grow

Change the verb form

grew

show examples

Change preposition

For anothers

show examples

Anothers

Correct your spelling

Another

years

Fix the agreement mistake

year

show examples

this

action

is gradually improve

Change the verb form

is gradually improved

show examples

and in 1989

sharply

Change the word

sharp

show examples

surge

Change preposition

in UK

show examples

residents

Change noun form

resident's

residents'

show examples

journey. For the

reason

Add a comma

,reason

show examples

this

process was

spark

Wrong verb form

sparked

show examples

economy

Add an article

the economy

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

centrury

Correct your spelling

century

Secondly

Add a comma

,Secondly

show examples

most

countries

are voyage to

Correct article usage

the UK

show examples

and

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

in 1999

Turkey

, Greece,

USA

Correct article usage

the USA

show examples

, Spain and

France

governments inhabitants

prevails

Correct subject-verb agreement

prevail

show examples

Turkey

and Greece people just under 5

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

, USA 4

milions

Correct your spelling

millions

, Spain just under 10

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and

France

just above 10

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

( approximately 12

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

) have portions by

visit

Add an article

a visit

show examples

Correct article usage

the UK

show examples

Submitted by vasif.askerlii on Thu Mar 16 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, countries, turkey, france, millions with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "just under" was used 2 times.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
50Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

198 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.

The picture shows coffee bean production. Summarise the information and give comparison when necessary.

Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

the most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Fewer and fewer young people are choosing to become teachers. Why do young people not want to be teachers? How could this be changed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.