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Band 4

Having a good university degree guarantees people good job. a To what extent do you agree?

#university #guarantees #people #job
In
this
 modern era,it is widely recognized that the majority of
students
 are fascinated to do
Add an article
a master
show examples
master
Change noun form
master's
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 degree at
fame
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
university
.
However
,studying at
famous
Correct article usage
a famous
show examples
 institute would bring a lot of jobs to the aspirants.I totally agree
about
Change preposition
with
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this
 statement regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the benefits of studying at
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 college. To commence with,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
 these days numerous
students
 are trying to get
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
admission
at
Change preposition
to
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well ranked
Add a hyphen
well-ranked
show examples
university
,which would bring
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
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 number of advantages to them
such
 as experienced professors,nice infrastructure and digital classrooms.
According to
 the recent research of Oxford
University
 on five-star rating
universities
,which they revealed that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
famous
universities
 would give a plethora of
job
 opportunities to their
students
.
For example
,
Hardward
Correct your spelling
Hardware
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
 is
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
one of the best
universities
 across the globe,
Correct word choice
and that
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that
Correct determiner usage
the
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 college
gave
Wrong verb form
has given
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 100% placements to their
students
since
Change preposition
for
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 one decade.
Moreover
,if the
students
 have that
university
 certificate, a myriad of
multi national
Correct your spelling
multinational
show examples
 companies would give
good
Add an article
the good
a good
show examples
 package to them and it assists them their entire life without any
job related
Add a hyphen
job-related
show examples
 problems.Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good
university
 plays a significant role across the globe,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
 it is difficult to get
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
admission
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 that
well ranked
Add a hyphen
well-ranked
show examples
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
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. On the other side of the coin,only 5% of
universities
 are
five star
Add a hyphen
five-star
show examples
 ratings,remaining 95% of educational institutes are below 5% ratings.So,it is very difficult to get admission in that
fame
Replace the word
famous
show examples
university
 to the
students
.
For example
,in
India
Add a comma
India,
show examples
 most of the
students
 are completing their graduation at
lower ranked
Add a hyphen
lower-ranked
show examples
universities
 , but they would get
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good employment at various organizations.Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
not only they got good marks but
also
 they are good at
english
Change the capitalization
English
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 communication abilities.
Furthermore
,the
universities
Change noun form
university's
universities'
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 seats are so
limit
Change the form of the verb
limited
show examples
,
so
Correct word choice
that
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 only a few young aspirants
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
get a chance to study in those institutes.
To sum up
,studying at
fame
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
university
 would
be
Verb problem
bring
show examples
 brought good degree,it
aids to
Verb problem
would
show examples
 bring a ton of
job
 opportunities
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.What is more,that
university
 certificate guarantees to get a
job
 and their life will be
settleted
Correct your spelling
settled
 and
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 life will be filled with
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of joy and happiness.
In these
Change preposition
These
show examples
 days, getting a good
job
 is so difficult in many nations,so if we have good
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they would directly give placements to the
students
.
Submitted by Myat on

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coherence cohesion
The essay shows some flaws in logical structure, but the overall sequence of ideas is discernible. The introduction needs to be clearer and the conclusion is abrupt. The main points are only partially supported with relevant examples.
task achievement
The essay attempts to respond to the task, but the arguments lack depth and clarity. The ideas presented need to be more comprehensive and relevant examples should be provided to support the arguments.

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