IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that olympic games do not have any role to play in society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

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The issue of
play
Change the verb form
playing
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 a
role
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 in some famous
world
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 competitions has turned into a significant problem in
this
Linking Words
 century. some
people
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 believe that
Use synonyms
Olympic
Correct article usage
the Olympic
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games
Use synonyms
 do not have an important
role
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 in our
society
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.
on the other hand
Linking Words
, some think that
world
Use synonyms
 competitions can have an interactive effect on the community.
i
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I
show examples
 completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 idea and the following essay will explore both sides of the
arguments
Fix the agreement mistake
argument
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. First and foremost, no one can ever deny the significance of famous
world
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event
Fix the agreement mistake
events
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 like
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the olympic
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olympic
Change the capitalization
Olympic
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games
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
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. in
this
Linking Words
 way, certain groups of
people
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 believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 that type of
competitions
Fix the agreement mistake
competition
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 have
many
Change the quantifier
much
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 worse effect on our community.
for instance
Linking Words
, imposing a financial burden on the countries and the governments should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
tackle the issue of that.
in addition
Linking Words
, the interactive effect
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 just for special groups of
people
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
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. to put it more simply, that type of competition
are
Change the verb form
is
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 designed just for specific
of
Change preposition
apply
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humans. Some might believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 presenting the country and the culture of that
society
Use synonyms
 in the
world
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 by just holding the
Use synonyms
olympic
Change the capitalization
Olympic
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 is a simple way for the government authorities to show off themself in the
world
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. Generally, holding that type of competition
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 a significant
role
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 for that country. take ,
for example
Linking Words
 , increasing the job position for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young
people
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and
Correct word choice
apply
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it caused
the
Correct article usage
apply
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happiness in the community dynamics.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that
Use synonyms
Olympic
Correct article usage
the Olympic
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 have an important
role
Use synonyms
 in our
society
Use synonyms
. and it reflects the power and culture of that country.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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