IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The graph below shows the amount of money spent on six consumer goods in 4 countries. Explain in details

The graph below shows the amount of money spent on six consumer goods in 4 countries. Explain in details
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart provides information on how 4 countries spent on six main expenditures. X-axis gives data on the amount
money
Change preposition
of money
show examples
 spent in
sterling
Add an article
the sterling
a sterling
show examples
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 (thousands)
while
Linking Words
 Y-axis shows six different items. Both Britain and France mostly spent on photographic films which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 170,00 sterling pounds
while
Linking Words
 in Italy and Germany, the highest expense was on toys.The amount spent on perfumes and tennis racquets was
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 and was responsible for the largest cost in Germany which was 150,000 sterling pounds. Britain's
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
 on all six consumer goods
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 either the highest or equal compared to
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 3 countries.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: