Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of high school students having part-time jobs. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.

this

Linking Words

concurrent era,

work

Use synonyms

is a necessity of life. There is a discussion going on, that many

pupil

Change to a plural noun

pupils

show examples

like to do

temperory

Correct your spelling

temporary

work

Use synonyms

along with

Linking Words

their studies. I will discuss both merits and demerits of

this

Linking Words

notion in forthcoming paragraphs. To commence with the pros of

Add an article

the part

show examples

part time

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

job

Use synonyms

. First and foremost is that children would become independent. To elaborate

Linking Words

this

Change preposition

on this

show examples

students

Use synonyms

generally

work

Use synonyms

with their

education

Use synonyms

just for money. They need any source of income to

fullfil

Correct your spelling

fulfil

their needs.

Due to

Linking Words

that they become independent and achieve their wishes

Linking Words

according to

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that. To exemplify

this

Linking Words

, many migrant

students

Use synonyms

in Canada and Australia do part-time jobs for their college fee and their

livlihood

Correct your spelling

livelihood

. They complete their needs by themselves.

In addition

Linking Words

, youngsters

also

Linking Words

gain some experience with that. Every

job

Use synonyms

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

skills to

individual

Add an article

the individual

an individual

show examples

that would help in future as well. They can use that experience for upcoming jobs or businesses.

However

Linking Words

, there are some cons of

temperory

Correct your spelling

temporary

job

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

Firstly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

can put

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

effect on

Use synonyms

education

Add an article

the education

show examples

students

Use synonyms

. Because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

usually learners spend their maximum time at

Use synonyms

work places

Correct your spelling

workplaces

show examples

to earn more. They do not give much attention

toward

Change preposition

show examples

their studies.

Thus

Linking Words

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

a result

show examples

result

Add a comma

,result

show examples

they do not achieve good grades in their exams.

For instance

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

Remove the article

apply

show examples

research, pupils who do

part-time

Add an article

the part-time

show examples

Use synonyms

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

with their schooling receive bad results in

education

Use synonyms

than others. Despite

this

Linking Words

, high school

students

Use synonyms

are at their

pubirty

Correct your spelling

puberty

stage. If they start working at

this

Linking Words

age they cannot enjoy

with

Correct pronoun usage

themselves with

show examples

their family or friends, as

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

these

show examples

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

precious days of life that they can

utlize

Correct your spelling

utilise

with them and make some memories for them. So

this

Linking Words

would

lost

Change the verb form

be lost

lose

show examples

due to

Linking Words

work

Use synonyms

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

work

Use synonyms

would be important for some. But, it can

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

the

education

Use synonyms

pupil

Fix the agreement mistake

pupils

show examples

and

that is

Linking Words

much more important

that

Correct word choice

than

show examples

anything.

amrindersinghynr89

Mar 19, 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

work experience
time management
responsibility
customer service
financial independence
financial responsibility
parental support
value of money
work ethic
disciplined
dedicated
academic performance
balancing responsibilities
decline
limited leisure time
extracurricular activities
hobbies
socializing
personal development
stress
fatigue
demands
schoolwork
well-being

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Students attend university to improve their prospects and find suitable employment after graduation. For this reason, some feel that they should focus all their energy on their main subjects to gain a relevant qualification. Others want a more well-rounded education, so they try to learn about additional subjects.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of high school students having part-time jobs. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In many parts of the world, women study science and technology, but donot work in these fields. What measures can be taken to encourage women to work in science and technology?

While some people consider global warming to be more pressing environmental problem which we have at the moment, others believe that deforestation has more devastating impacts on our worlds. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.