IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

it is neither possible nor useful to provide university places for high proportion of young people . To what entent do you agree or disagree

#university #places #proportion #people #entent
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Some people might argue that providing tertiary
education
Use synonyms
 for the majority of young people is not possible or useful. Personally, I agree with these ideas and will outline my reasons in the essay below.
Firstly
Linking Words
, having a university qualification plays no longer a vital role in the future of young humans even in
this
Linking Words
 knowledge-based society. In almost all prospering countries, including Germany and England, vocational training has gained more popularity among young people because it enhances employment opportunities after graduation.
Instead
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 of spending many years at university to obtain a formal degree, young trainees have a tendency to start up their own businesses, which helps them manage their jobs better.  
Secondly
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, I think it is infeasible to accommodate almost all young communities with access to tertiary
education
Use synonyms
. In Vietnam, the demand for enrolling in college is always increasing.
This
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 puts the government in a dilemma of investing in and equipping modern facilities on the grounds that they have to face up to an insufficient financial predicament. And, because Vietnam is one of the most multi-ethnical countries, accommodating higher training in remote areas is more challenging. Providers need to get through arduous journeys
such
Linking Words
 as crossing the river or forest in order that they can help ethnical students have a close distance to tertiary
education
Use synonyms
.  In conclusion, I strongly oppose the idea of dispensing university
education
Use synonyms
 to a high proportion of schoolers owing to the arguments presented above
Submitted by honglethiminh1975 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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