IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that teenagers should follow the old generation but others believe that they sould challenge the old thoughts. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #teenagers #generation #sould #challenge #thoughts
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There are some
people
 who believe that
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 young
generation
 should imitate their elder ones,
while
 other
group
Change the wording
groups
show examples
 think that they should chase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ancient thoughts .
This
 essay will discuss both topics where
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I am
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the view that there should be some parameters for youngsters ,to obey and challenge old
people
. There
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
lot
Add an article
a lot
show examples
 of morality
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
kept by
older
Correct article usage
the older
show examples
generation
 at their times and they are still
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 their daily
life
. Following that habits and
attitude
Fix the agreement mistake
attitudes
show examples
 in the
life
 of
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
show examples
generation
 will help them to
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 a profound impact on their
life
 . The attitude towards
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
such
 as saving wealth for future
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
, avoiding unnecessary
expenditure
Fix the agreement mistake
expenditures
show examples
 and
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
 religious ceremonies are some valuable habits of old
people
 and which can
br
Correct your spelling
be
copy
Wrong verb form
copied
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 young
people
's
life
 .so in that context following elder
people
 is worth full in
life
 .
On the other hand
 , there were a lot of myths and traditions carried out by
old
Correct article usage
the old
show examples
generation
 and they are compelling
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers to follow
such
 superstitious beliefs. These prompts from their grand partners should be avoided
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
adhere to the new technologies and developments of
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
 world.
For instance
 ,
Correct your spelling
there
theee
Correct your spelling
there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 certain days
considers
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
 as bad and didn't allow
people
 to attend celebrations.it should be changed and challenged by the young
people
 and look forward to
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
 a successful full
life
 rather than
follow
Wrong verb form
following
show examples
 the superstitions There are some points which can
be adopt
Change the verb form
be adopted
show examples
by the new
generation
 from
ther
Correct your spelling
the
 old
people
 , which help them to keep values and trust in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
 . These ideas can help them to
succed
Correct your spelling
succeed
 in the future and create a fruitful
life
 .
In
contrast
Add a comma
,contrast
show examples
 the traditional and unnecessary
believes
Replace the word
beliefs
show examples
 should be eradicated from the community, and it's the obligation of upcoming generations .
Hence
 they should challenge these myths which
carried
Add a missing verb
were carried
show examples
 out by their ancestors.
To sum up
 ,even though there are certain
practise
Replace the word
practice
show examples
 which the young
generation
 should follow from their elder
people
 , they should ask questions and chase their elders in the case
myths
Change preposition
of myths
show examples
 and traditions. So that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society can
be go
Change the verb form
go
show examples
 forward more scientifically and technically
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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