IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

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Many
people
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 argued that
experiments
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 on living
things
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 like
animals
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 are
Add an article
a violation
show examples
violation
Fix the agreement mistake
violations
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. These
people
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 assert that
animals
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 can feel pain like humans do, so we have to stop animal
tests
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.
However
Linking Words
, If experimentation on
animals
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 were not conducted, there will be nothing for
people
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 to cure or care
materials
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for materials
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. Some
people
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 argue that animal
tests
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 are
abusement
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abuse
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 by a human, because
animals
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also
Linking Words
 have
Correct article usage
the rights
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rights
Fix the agreement mistake
right
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 to live, that human
being
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beings
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 can not abuse those
things
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. At the same time, living
things
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 like rats, pigs and other
animals
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 would feel fatal pain from animal
tests
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. Of
course
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,course
show examples
Linking Words
this
Change the determiner
these
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 assertions are true, but living in modern times, eliminating animal
experiments
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 is
unevitable
Correct your spelling
inevitable
. Thanks to the progress of medicine, many
people
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 have a chance to live longer and even cure their
body
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bodies
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. At
this
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 moment, animal
tests
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 are
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 key point.
For instance
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, by testing
animals
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 to create drugs to cure cancer,
people
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 who suffered from cancer can be cured and live longer.
In addition
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,
people
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 who want to be a parent
although
Linking Words
 they have no ability to carry a baby,
also
Linking Words
 have benefits
through
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from
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 animal
experiments
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. Because it can not be conducted
to
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on
show examples
 humans,
things
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 like using a uterus. So we use
animals
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 to find these solutions, at
this
Linking Words
 point, we can find our benefits from animal
experiments
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.
To sum up
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, owing to experimentation on
animals
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, nowadays
people
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 are living in a better world than
the
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in the
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 past. If the
techniqe
Correct your spelling
technique
 develops, we might consider getting rid of those
experiments
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, but
this
Linking Words
tis
Correct your spelling
is
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
 the time.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific breakthroughs
  • ethical concerns
  • alternatives
  • animal testing
  • moral implications
  • ethical considerations
  • vivisection
  • research methods
  • ethical dilemmas
  • animal welfare
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