IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #money #poverty #aid
There is no doubt that some rich
countries
 play a major role in helping poorer
countries
 financially, but sometimes that kind of help doesn't solve the problem of poverty. There are different ways that might help in solving
this
 problem that should be taken into consideration. I believe that another kind of
assists
Replace the word
assistance
show examples
 would be better.
To begin
 with, rich
countries
 are one of the most significant contributors to the poorer
countries
 to the development of the country.
However
, supporting these
countries
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 financial aid is not the best solution since it is a short-term solution. It is important to realize that rich
countries
 have the ability to assist poor
countries
 by giving them some tips and ways to solve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
economical issues.
For example
, they can teach them their experience or new information about how to conduct a new business. Another key point, rich
countries
 should lend a hand to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
needy
countries
 by sending food, school supplies and some medical treatments which could reduce their needs.
For instance
, the money the other
countries
 would send can be used for illegal things
such
 as drugs, that's why it is very essential to send specific help which can solve the main problem.
To sum up
,
although
 sending
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
financial support
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
countries
 is beneficial, it will be more useful to fund these
countries
 with more essential covers. In my opinion, developed
countries
 have to help
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 several ways rather than sending money.
Submitted by malak.ayman1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: