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Band 6.5

Women will play an increasingly important role at workplace in future. But this may disturb their family lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#women #role #workplace #future #lives
It is a fact that female participation in all jobs
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 increasing and will continue in
coming
Correct article usage
the coming
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 days. Even though currently they are facing some troubles with their family lives , I believe that it can be cleared out in future because of two major reasons.  Primarily,
women
Correct article usage
the women
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work force
Correct your spelling
workforce
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 got a large acceptance in
modern
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the modern
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 world,
hence
 both governments and private firms give enormous support to females to carry out both their family lives and profession together. To explain, by providing flexible
work
 hours, allowances and leave patterns for them to balance their time for the family and
job
.
Due to
which
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this
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, more ladies will
Add a missing verb
be encouged
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encouged
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encouraged
 to find a
job
 and earn their own.
For example
, maternity and
child care
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childcare
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 leaves in NHS
prompting
Wrong verb form
prompt
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 girls to search for a
job
 in
health
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the health
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 care sector.
As a result
, most of the nurses in that particular organisation are females.
Overall
 the huge support from employers is the reason to attract female workers without any concern about their family life.
In addition
 to that, the encouragement from educated parents and partners
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 another reason for increasing women
work force
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workforce
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.
Thus
 they will be
more free
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freer
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 to concentrate on their studies and attend competitive exams to achieve their carrier .
This
phenomena
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phenomenon
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 in
the
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apply
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society will help to eradicate the belief that , females are supposed to stay
in
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at
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home
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a home
the home
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 rather than go for
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a job
the job
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job
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jobs
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.
Furthermore
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,Furthermore
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 various facilities like nursery and
child care
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childcare
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 settings will help them to reduce the stress about the children. So the environment
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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create
Wrong verb form
created
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 by families and
other
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others
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 are allowing girls to
work
 and lead
important
Correct article usage
an important
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role
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roles
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 in their institutions.
To sum up
, the benefits and support from employers and families is encouraging women to go for
Add an article
a job
the job
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 without concern about their family lives. So I disagree with the statement.
Submitted by geokavalackal on

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