Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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In the 21st century, most manufacturers' products have a high level of
sugar
Use synonyms
, which can cause health issues. There is an argument among some masses, that sugary product should be more expensive, which prevent people to purchase sugary foods.
While
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I agree with
this
Linking Words
idea,
but
Correct word choice
apply
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I'm not totally consented with it in some aspects. First of all, in recent decades most folk have been suffering
by
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from
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diabetes,
thus
Linking Words
It's significantly important to find a solution
for
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to
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this
Linking Words
issue.
In addition
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, consuming sugary foods can have a detrimental impact on anybody's teeth,
,
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apply
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Linking Words
Correct word choice
and consequently
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consequently
Add a comma
,consequently
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It could cause lots of problems during the elderly period.
Furthermore
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, using
sugar
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in routine cuisine has a central role in obesity, which has become a worldwide problem nowadays and lots of people all over the world have suffered from it.
On the other hand
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, most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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foods are made
by
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with
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sugar
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, so we need substitutes for them, which can be a challenge. Sometimes consuming
sugar
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don't
Change the verb form
doesn't
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have a simple impact,
For example
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, research done by German scientists has shown that fattening by
sugar
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dramatically depends on an individual's genes,
thus
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it does not affect everyone in the same way. Another facet of enhancing the price of
sugar
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that I like to mention is economical inflation, which raises another issue
subsequently
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. In conclusion,
while
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the increase in
sugar
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prices has consequences, I agree with the idea, because the community's health is more important than anything else, so governments should take steps to solve
this
Linking Words
issue in some ways that people's health can be preserved.
Submitted by arsalan.azizzadeh on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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