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Writing Samples
Band 5

Most modern families have both parents working and as a result children spend less and less time with their parents. What is the reason for this? What solutions can you suggest?

It is undeniable that both
parents
Use synonyms
 have to work for their
families
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 results in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
less
time
Use synonyms
 they can spend with their children. I will discuss the leading causes and suggest a few practical solutions
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 situation.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, a globalised world has
revolutionising
Wrong verb form
revolutionised
show examples
 most today's
families
Use synonyms
 in many ways. First and foremost, most fathers and mothers have to make ends meet.
That is
Linking Words
 to say, some people are in the poverty line,
thus
Linking Words
, it leads to possible causes of why most
parents
Use synonyms
 are not able to spend
time
Use synonyms
 with their
kids
Use synonyms
 and they have to leave their
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
show examples
 alone frequently.
As a result
Linking Words
, most
kids
Use synonyms
 might have mental health problems when they grow up, which is detrimental to their development in the long run.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Thailand, the majority of
families
Use synonyms
 do not reside with their
kids
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employment reasons.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some useful procedures to deal with
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon should be taken into account.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the governments are supposed to impose some measures which allow
parents
Use synonyms
 to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
quality
time
Use synonyms
 with their
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
show examples
. Needless to say,
this
Linking Words
 will help enhance better standards of living as everyone shares their meaningful moments together.
For example
Linking Words
, in Finland, citizens are allowed to take
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
parental leave when they have a baby,
thus
Linking Words
, it is beneficial for
juveniles's
Remove the s
juveniles'
show examples
 growth.
Furthermore
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, certain activities should be introduced for both
parents
Use synonyms
 and their
kids
Use synonyms
, so they can improve their intimacy among family members. The more they spend
time
Use synonyms
 with their
families
Use synonyms
, the stronger bonds they will have. In conclusion, in modern times, most
families
Use synonyms
 have been affected by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
competitive societies.
That is
Linking Words
 why fathers and mothers are required to make meet ends, but it leads to certain problems
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the young.
Therefore
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,
pratical
Correct your spelling
practical
 solutions should be imposed by governments and individuals.

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