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Band 5

Nowadays public transport prices are constantly increasing. Why do you think it is happening? How can this problem be solved?

#transport #prices
The cost of public
transportation
 is becoming increasingly expensive in our modern life. The essay will examine the leading causes of high public
transport
 prices and possible solutions to
this
 problem. People working in the public
transport
 system command to get high salary.
For example
, the public
transport
 worker can't get enough income to meet the high
requirement
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
show examples
 of modern if they don't increase the prices.
Thus
, the increasing price
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 the workers live a better life. The fuel and power
resources
 consumed by public
transportation
 have become more expensive.
Due to
 irrational exploitation,
energy
resources
 become more and more precious.
For instance
, public
transport
 companies must pay more for fuel and
resources
.
Therefore
, higher prices allow public
transport
 companies to purchase expensive
energy
resources
.
Some
Correct determiner usage
One
show examples
 possible solution to
this
 problem is improving the workers' salaries. By cutting the tax and economic support by the government, we can release pressure on public
transport
 workers' income and avoid complaints among them.
Additionally
, people can reduce the time driving their own cars. It is not only the responsibility of the government to encourage people to take public
transportation
; the public should
also
 regard the public as the primary
transport
 choice. In
this
 way, we will have more customers using public
transportation
 and reduce the
energy
 consumption of personal vehicles in the meantime. In conclusion, the decline in the population using public
transportation
 and the shortage of
energy
resources
 causes the increasing public
transport
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
.
However
, we can prevent
this
 by reducing taxes or prioritizing public transit over personal driving.
Submitted by 1415380703 on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but need improvement. Logical structure is weak and needs improvement.
task achievement
The response to the task is incomplete. Ideas are somewhat clear and comprehensive but lack specific relevant examples.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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