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Band 6.5

The chart below show information about animals and rainfall at the Nboro Nature reserve .Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.

The chart below show information about animals and rainfall at the Nboro Nature reserve .Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.
#show #information #animals #rainfall #nboro #nature #reserve #summarise #features #comparison
The
two
 bar graphs provide information about the
number
 of
two
 different
animals
 namely;
Zebras
 and
Buffalos
 and the
amount
 of rainfall, in Nboro Nature Reserve, in four different years (2005, 2007, 2009 and 2011). Generally speaking, the
two
 charts indicate that there was a clear positive relation between the
number
 of
animals
 and the
amount
 of
rain
Correct your spelling
rainfall
show examples
fall
 in the reserve. And by end of the
period
Add a comma
,period
show examples
 both the
number
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
animals
 and the
amount
 of
rain
Correct your spelling
rainfall
show examples
fall
 increased. To start with, in 2005, the
number
 of
zebras
 in Nboro reserve was nearly 50
zebras
, and almost 40
buffalos
, meanwhile the
amount
 of
rain
Correct your spelling
rainfall
show examples
fall
 was well over 600
millimeters
Change the spelling
millimetres
show examples
.
Two
 years later, in 2007, the rate of
rain
Correct your spelling
rainfall
show examples
fall
 rose roughly to 1100
millimeters
Change the spelling
millimetres
show examples
;
similarly
, the
number
 of both
animals
 rose noticeably to about 70
zebras
 and just over 80
buffalos
.
However
, the picture in 2009 is slightly different, the
rain
Correct your spelling
rainfall
show examples
fall
 dropped to nearly 650
millimeters
Change the spelling
millimetres
show examples
, and so did the
number
 of
zebras
 to just fewer than 70, but the
number
 of
buffalos
 continued to rise to well over 115. Moving on to 2011, which shows peak time for all categories; rainfall hit the highest at almost 1200
millimeters
Change the spelling
millimetres
show examples
, and the
number
 of
zebras
 increased to well over 82 and just under 120
buffalos
.
Submitted by vet.lezan on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words two, number, animals, zebras, buffalos, amount, rain, fall, millimeters with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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