IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Society is based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they want to do, it could not function. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
it is true that
rules
Use synonyms
 and
laws
Use synonyms
 are the basic foundation of society. personally, I hold the belief that individuals should be allowed to do whatever they want in certain circumstances despite the essence of
regulations
Use synonyms
 and
laws
Use synonyms
. it is worth mentioning that
rules
Use synonyms
 and
regulations
Use synonyms
 play an important role in controlling
people
Use synonyms
's behaviours and personalities. in the modern era, society would deteriorate into chaos without the imposition of
rules
Use synonyms
 and
laws
Use synonyms
 because
people
Use synonyms
 are likely to commit a crime and take advantage of each other.
Linking Words
as
Capitalize word
As
show examples
 a result, the number of criminals would increase dramatically, which would lead to
people
Use synonyms
's disordered lives.
furthermore
Linking Words
, the political system can not operate in an appropriate way
due to
Linking Words
 the lack of
regulations
Use synonyms
, especially in impoverished nations, as governments are unable to control their citizens or develop their countries without strict
rules
Use synonyms
 or
laws
Use synonyms
. despite the aforementioned arguments, I still believe that everyone should be allowed to take actions on their own
in particular
Linking Words
 situations, regardless of the restrictions
rules
Use synonyms
 and
regulations
Use synonyms
. it is supposed that some
rules
Use synonyms
 and
laws
Use synonyms
 do more harm than good. most of them are only beneficial for a minority of
people
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the majority is negatively affected by what is thought to be imposed with a view to protecting them from dangers.
for instance
Linking Words
, in
Viet Nam
Correct your spelling
Vietnam
show examples
, it is illegal to own a gun, so it is impossible for its citizens to defend themselves effectively when criminals break into their homes or attempt to murder them.
therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should have the right to do whatever in an emergency. in conclusion, I strongly believe that everyone needs to have their own choices in certain situations,
although
Linking Words
 the foundation of society is appropriate
rules
Use synonyms
 and
laws
Use synonyms
. it is predicted that the number of
regulations
Use synonyms
 will decrease significantly in order to ensure
people
Use synonyms
's well-being.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your essay should provide a clear opinion on the given statement and address both sides of the argument. You need to elaborate more on the impact of rules and laws on society and the individuals' freedom within the societal framework.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay shows some organization and connection between ideas, but there are some issues with the logical flow and coherence. Try to structure your paragraphs more effectively and make sure your ideas flow in a logical and coherent order.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • social order
  • harmonious
  • individual freedoms
  • societal norms
  • unrestricted freedom
  • crime rates
  • dysfunctional
  • fair distribution
  • human rights
  • justice system
  • accountability
  • enforcing laws
  • restrictive regulations
  • societal functionality
  • legal frameworks
What to do next:
Look at other essays: