IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some scientists think that computers will soon become more intelligent than humans. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#scientists #computers #humans
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often argued that
humen
Correct your spelling
humans
 will be replaced by artificial intelligence in future by few scholars. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion and think that reasoning and calculative abilities are enough for them to succeed to men. First of all, I believe that robots are on stage that they are capable to think and determine
Add an article
the situation
show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
 and take decisions
accordingly
Linking Words
.
For example
Linking Words
,
Correct article usage
the eskimo
show examples
eskimo
Change the capitalization
Eskimo
show examples
 robot developed by
japanese
Change the capitalization
Japanese
show examples
mitsubitchi
Correct your spelling
Mitsubishi
 heavy industries is capable of observing human emotions and do day to day tasks. Other countries are
also
Linking Words
 following
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
suite
Correct your spelling
suit
show examples
 and
developong
Correct your spelling
developing
 their own varieties which in turn will increase
society
Change noun form
society's
show examples
 dependence on them and
becoming
Wrong verb form
become
show examples
 lazy.
Secondly
Linking Words
, many modern vehicles and satellites
uses
Change the verb form
use
show examples
 AI
capabities
Correct your spelling
capabilities
capacities
 of computers and there is always a chance of hijack.
In other words
Linking Words
,
In other words
Linking Words
,
Correct article usage
the developement
show examples
developement
Correct your spelling
development
 of connected vehicles is being promoted by many manufacturers. People who love their jobs can easily excel in their fields of work and achieve better results than those, who put salary
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first place.
For instance
Linking Words
, Henry Miller decided to leave his everyday job despite a good wage and ventured to become a writer. And after enduring years of ups and
downs
Add a comma
,downs
show examples
 he became one of the most famous and well-paid authors of the twentieth century.
Thus
Linking Words
,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of jobs that keep you satisfied outweigh the drawback of a low salary in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 long-term perspective. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, I strongly believe that job satisfaction is more beneficial than
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 salary because it makes people happy and motivated.
Submitted by jassisingh320 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • machine learning
  • emotional intelligence
  • technological singularity
  • ethical concerns
  • job displacement
  • autonomous systems
  • augmented reality
  • cognitive computing
  • data privacy
  • algorithmic bias
  • human-machine collaboration
  • technophobia
  • innovation
  • adaptive systems
  • robotic automation
  • ethical reasoning
  • computational limitations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: