Nowadays, some workplaces tend to employ equal numbers of men and women workers. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Compared to the past time, some companies appear to be conscious of defending females’ legitimate rights and take tacts like hiring equal
numbers
of men and women
workers
. In my opinion, it’s definitely a positive change that makes a broader impact on social well-being in terms of offering a healthy and fair labour market, but there
is still necessary to find a balance between making sure the same Correct pronoun usage
it
numbers
of workers
in both two genders and thinking about the workforce structure in specific fields.
To begin
with, giving equal chances to women
ensures that female workers
are able to step up and shine their own light on working and make contributions to every field in society, instead
of being ignored or denied before beginning for their gender
standing. For example
, some universities not only have an eye on ensuring the same number of researchers and scientists of both genders but also
set up a foundation encouraging women
on applying
for PhD. Compared to decades ago, when females weren’t illuminated as suffering Change preposition
to apply
gender
discrimination, which put them in such
a dilemma of having little likelihood to dig into science, it’s definitely a huge progress.
However
, discussing other working contexts where gender
traits are manifested, employing equal numbers
of men and women
workers
is not always a wise strategy. Especially when it comes to the male and female-dominated fields. For instance
, construction needs force and power to a higher standard ,since workers
are assigned to burden heavy stocks and wood, which means hiring male workers
can finish projects more effectively because it’s their inherently strong suit.But in the field of medical care ,which requires taking care of patients with more empathy and patience, women
definitely are good at easing patients’ pain and caring about their emotions. Therefore
, forcing hiring an equal number of male and female workers
can probably lead to reduced efficiency,or reducing the experience of relevant service.
In conclusion, employing equal numbers
of men and women
workers
is a remarkable practice to ensure women
workers
can shine their light and prevent gender
discrimination. However
, employers should think about such
a practice in a collaborative way and make decisions combined with the specific working context. Basic
on the inclusive approach, both benefits of the two sides would not be harmed.Correct your spelling
Based
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Task Response
Task Response: Overall, the essay provides a complete response to the task. The writer offers a clear opinion and discusses both positive and negative aspects of employing equal numbers of men and women workers. However, the reasoning could be strengthened by providing more specific examples and addressing each aspect in more detail.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay is sound, with clear introduction and conclusion present. The main points are generally supported with relevant examples and reasoning, but there is room for improvement in connecting ideas more effectively between paragraphs and providing a stronger conclusion that summarizes the main points.