Some people think women should be given equal chances to work and excel in their careers. Others believe that a woman’s role should be limited to taking care of the house and children. Which opinion do you agree with and why? Include specific details and examples to support your choice

As we are living in an era filled with challenges in all walks of
life
with a cutting-edge world of technology and
prosperous
Correct article usage
a prosperous
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economy accompanied by
life
and
work
issues of getting
job
opportunities with affordable income to maintain a better
life
and meet the needs of both
men
and
women
as well.
However
,
although
a number of people believe that
women
should stay at home and take
of
Replace the word
off
show examples
their children,
while
Correct word choice
apply
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others embrace the notion that
women
should share
this
settled
life
financially as well and they are definitely able to manage both
house
Change to a plural noun
houses
show examples
and
work
successfully. In my opinion, I strongly believe the second belief for
women
to
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
equal
job
opportunity
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opportunities
show examples
for many benefits. One obvious reason is that
women
proved to be
professiont
Correct your spelling
professional
professions
in their
work
,if not equal with their partners, more competent and disciplined for most careers.
For instance
, as we live in a thriving social and economic development, many
job
opportunities have opened their gates for
women
to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
career
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
various government sectors
such
as medical, financial,
even
Correct word choice
and even
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military ministries.
In other words
, new
of
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apply
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women
students have just graduated from the military royal ministry to share
this
kind of
job
which some people assume that only limited to
men
.
Consequently
, the female
receive
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receives
show examples
higher
Add an article
a higher
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salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
to manage their house and children to send them
learn
Add the particle
to learn
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in
a better educational schools
Correct the article-noun agreement
better educational schools
a better educational school
show examples
and afford other courses to enhance their
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
in
life
. After
work
, they
also
can observe and take care of them and cook observe and support them in what they encounter and attempt
dealing
Change the verb form
to deal
show examples
with difficulties,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
unlike
Add the comma(s)
,unlike
show examples
men
, they cannot
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
multitasking
Wrong verb form
multitask
show examples
merely seeking relaxation after working. Another beneficial role in integrating
women
in the
work
markets is that they have mutual responsibilities with their husbands to manage their lives which
Add a missing verb
is
show examples
hard for
men
to afford and be responsible
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
themselves. Since we live nowadays in higher prosperous living in all fields, more demanding salaries
preferred
Add a missing verb
are preferred
show examples
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
they will definitely manage together and have more satisfaction to improve their lives. In conclusion, I think
women
successfully proved and played
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
considerable assistance beside their partner males to manage their lives socially and financially.
Submitted by faf_8000 on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gender equality
  • Women empowerment
  • Breaking stereotypes
  • Equal opportunities
  • Career advancement
  • Progressive societies
  • Work-life balance
  • Changing perceptions
  • Successful women
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