IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart gives
the
Correct article usage
apply
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information on the proportions of citizens' different
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
tea
Use synonyms
 buying behaviours and drinking habits. The survey was conducted in five Australian cities in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 4 weeks. Sydney saw the largest proportion, nearly 45%, of people buying fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
, but that was not as much as
intant
Correct your spelling
instant
intent
coffee
Use synonyms
 consuming. The figure(42%) for Melbourne was a little lower than that. Over
a
Correct article usage
apply
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half of
Correct article usage
the individules
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individules
Correct your spelling
individuals
 in Hobart bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4 weeks, which is the biggest figure among all these cities,
although
Linking Words
 the gap with
other
Correct article usage
the other
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 four cities
were
Change the verb form
was
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 not extremely obvious. With regards to residents' drinking habits, the highest percentage of them going to a cafe for
coffee
Use synonyms
 or
tea
Use synonyms
 happened in Melbourne and Hobart, with 64% and 63% respectively.
While
Linking Words
 Adelaide saw the least proportion(under 35%) of citizens enjoying their
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
tea
Use synonyms
 in
such
Linking Words
 kind of place. In summary, people in Melbourne and Hobart
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to drink
coffee
Use synonyms
 or
tea
Use synonyms
 in a cafe,
while
Linking Words
individules
Correct your spelling
individuals
 in Sydney generally liked buying
coffee
Use synonyms
, fresh and instant
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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, the most.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last, while".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, tea with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • coffee
  • tea
  • buying habits
  • drinking habits
  • Australian cities
  • consumption
  • respondents
  • regular
  • participants
  • levels
  • observed
  • popular
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