IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day, while others believe that they must get homework every day in order to be successful at school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #homework #school
There are people, who believe that children should not be given extra pressure like
homework
 by their teachers at the same
time
 there are individuals who opine that
homeworks
Correct your spelling
homework
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 mandatory in a student's life. In
this
 essay, I will go through both sides of the argument and will explain my support for the latter view. In
this
 modern world, there are people who don't give much importance to education, they are the ones who argue that
homework
 isn't important in a schooling period. The reason behind it may be increasing pressure among them as children used to spend a majority of their valuable
time
 in school they at least spend 8 hours there ,
therefore
 they
are having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 a hectic schedule.
However
, it is not a good concept not to have any
Homework
 but both the parents and authorities should try to maintain a proper timetable even for studying and for leisure purposes. It is important that young ones need to spend
time
 in both studies and extracurricular activities.
While coming
Wrong verb form
When it comes
show examples
 to the next argument, educated people will always give importance to education, They are those who claim that
homework
 and
assignment
Fix the agreement mistake
assignments
show examples
 are mandatory in a child's life. Apart from all these, having some duties will help to make a child punctual in his or her work. More than
this
, children will be capable
to do
Change preposition
of doing
show examples
 their work.
In addition
, there are weaker or lazy students who aren't interested in studies so
this
 school work will
also
 help them to do their duties because these works need to be submitted in front of the teachers. In conclusion,
it is clear that
 school
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 and assignment need to be mandatory as it is beneficial to students. Anyway, it is
also
 important to have
time
 for leisure activities , from the above statement
it is clear that
 studies and extracurricular activities are important in a student's life so always take the necessary measures to ensure it.
Submitted by ameeshaaa19 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your essay more logically, use topic sentences and supporting details to improve coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Ensure your response covers all aspects of the task and includes relevant examples and reasoning. Develop your ideas more fully to achieve a higher score in task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: