In the modern world, it is possible to shop, work and communicate with poeple via internet and live without any face-to-face contact with others. Is it a positive or nagative development?

#world #shop #work #poeple #internet #contact #nagative #development

In contemporary society, technology has made it possible for people to perform several tasks,

such

as shopping, working, and communicating online without the need for physical interaction. I am of the opinion that

this

development can have detrimental effects on individuals and society as a whole. On the one hand, the internet made communication and social interactions easier for today's users.

Thus

, with the assistance of social networking platforms

such

as Facebook and Instagram, people can effortlessly stay connected with their friends, families, and colleagues, regardless of their geographical barriers.

Moreover

, online platforms, namely LinkedIn, have

also

opened up new employment opportunities for numerous employees, enabling them to advance their professions and enhance their living standards. Another wort-mentioning benefit is that virtual shopping is straightforward for online customers to access a wide range of goods and services at a reasonable price.

Nevertheless

this

tendency

also

has adverse consequences, including the degradation of social bonds. The over-reliance on social networking platforms, in fact, has led to the deterioration of personal relationships, which can have a negative impact on a person's emotional well-being.

Furthermore

, online communication can lead to misinterpretations and reduced productivity in the workplace since most workers cannot perform tasks effectively only through digital screens.

Finally

, online shopping can be unfavourable as consumers cannot determine the exact quality of several products demonstrated online, which can cause a sense of dissatisfaction and financial losses to those people. In conclusion,

while

the

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

has undoubtedly facilitated communication, work, and shopping, it is essential to acknowledge that relying heavily on it can lead to weakened social ties, inadequate knowledge in the workplace, and unexpected risks when shopping online.

Submitted by dangtranquoctrung01 on Mon Apr 03 2023

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task response

Ensure that your essay fully addresses all aspects of the essay prompt and provides a clear position on the issue. Include a balanced discussion of both the positive and negative aspects of the development.

coherence cohesion

Your essay shows a good organizational structure overall. However, consider using more transition words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas and the logical connection between sentences.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In the modern world, it is possible to shop, work and communicate with poeple via internet and live without any face-to-face contact with others. Is it a positive or nagative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

What are the main reasons and solutions for re-offend?

In the future, it seems more difficult to live on Earth. Some people think more money should be spent researching other planets, such as Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foregin language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advanantages of this outweight the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include some relevant examples.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for vary fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.