IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.

#overpopulation #areas #two #ones #governments #individuals
Nowadays more and more people are migrating to urban areas for better
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
 and education.
This
 circumstance has caused overpopulation which is the biggest
problem
 for cities.
This
 essay will look at some of
problems
Add an article
the problems
show examples
 of
this
 and offer some solutions.     In my opinion, the main
problem
 of overpopulation is increasing prices of everyday needs and housing. In urban
areas
Add a comma
,areas
show examples
 the land is becoming less available because of
overmoving
Correct your spelling
over moving
 to cities and causes
growing
Replace the word
growth
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
housing prices.
For example
, in
Tashkent
Add a comma
,Tashkent
show examples
 the price of flats has increased
nearly
Change preposition
by nearly
show examples
 50% and it is expected to grow more in the future. Another
problem
 is traffic jams which force people to wait for hours.
For example
, in our city traffic congestion is becoming more usual, because today more and more people are using their cars.     To solve
issues
Correct article usage
the issues
show examples
 that
discribed
Correct your spelling
described
 above, there are several solutions.
Firstly
, to decrease prices for housing governments should encourage construction companies to construct cheaper houses or to set up their bases in
near by
Correct your spelling
nearby
show examples
 suburbs.
Secondly
, improving
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 transport system is not only
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the best way to overcome traffic jams
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
 it helps to reduce
noise
Correct article usage
the noise
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 in urban areas.     In conclusion,
overpopulating
Replace the word
overpopulation
show examples
 is becoming a serious issue in cities. If we don't find solutions to tackle
this
problem
, there are would be bigger issues.
Submitted by moxinurabjalilova on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • strain on infrastructure
  • public services
  • overcrowded
  • inadequate healthcare services
  • pressure on educational institutions
  • environmental impact
  • increased pollution
  • waste management
  • destruction of green spaces
  • natural habitats
What to do next:
Look at other essays: