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Band 4.5

What Is the Global Warming Crisis? - A Global Warming Solution

#crisis
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Global warming has a huge impact on the
earth
Correct your spelling
Earth
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. The
world
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 has been facing many effects
from
Change preposition
of
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 global warming and I will cover these issues and some resolutions in
this
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 essay.
Firstly
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, global warming is a phenomenon where the earth’s average temperature rises
due to
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 increased amounts of greenhouse
gasses
Correct your spelling
gases
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such
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 as carbon dioxide and methane. Increased carbon dioxide destroys ozone layers, which usually block the incoming radiation from the sun, and trap radiation from leaving
Correct article usage
the earth
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earth
Correct your spelling
Earth
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. Once the temperature goes up, polar ice caps begin to melt, which leads to a rise in sea levels.
This
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 circumstance has influenced some animals,
such
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 as polar bears
suffering
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to suffer
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 from habitat loss and food shortage, to a large extent. Climate change,
such
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 as frequent and intense droughts and storms, will most likely cause more natural disasters and more calamity relief funds will be required.
Moreover
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, epidemics
such
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 as mosquito-borne diseases may spread around the
world
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.
Secondly
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, not only governments but
also
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 individuals need to take action to solve
this
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world
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 issue. Greenhouse emissions are generated mainly by industries and transportation and deforestation worsens the situation.
Therefore
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, Governments can create new rules against deforestation and arrange more afforestation programmes to absorb more carbon dioxide. New sources of energy, which are sustainable and environmentally friendly, need to be found. Green energy can be utilized for transportation. Switching to LED light bulbs and
energy efficient
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energy-efficient
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 appliances
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
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 to reducing greenhouse gasses as well.
To conclude
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,
although
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 global warming has many negative effects around the
world
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, I believe the intervention, ranging from countries to every single person, would deal with
this
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 problem.
Submitted by nanamach87 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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