IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some feel that movies and TV shows are a good way to study history despite their lack of historical accuracy at times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#feel #movies #tv #study #history #lack #accuracy #times
A few individuals have
emotion
Add an article
an emotion
the emotion
show examples
 that films and
tv
 vlogs are the right way to receive useful data about history even
there
Correct word choice
though there
show examples
 is
minority
Add an article
a minority
the minority
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 of specific knowledge linked with
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
 .
This
 essay will be explored with my
partly
Change the word
partial
show examples
 agreement.     To start with that
TV
 shows and movies are being felt like these 2 reveal ancient information widely, if the person has
lackness
Correct your spelling
blackness
lack ness
lacked
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 historical events. These factors can easily attract viewers
due to
 the huge desire to watch some performance and created films which are real that demonstrate
previous
Add an article
the previous
show examples
 lifestyle and spiritual satisfaction
instead
 of settling into one place with opening and paging book type and it feels irritating. Oppositely, there is still
visible
Add an article
a visible
show examples
 condition that
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
sitting in front of them may make you
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
devote more valuable time for less and
also
 some health problems might
be appear
Change the verb form
appear
show examples
.   To pursue
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that, the views of humans that they consider about movies and
TV
 demonstrations are
useful
Add an article
a useful
show examples
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 to learn passed
era
Fix the agreement mistake
eras
show examples
although
 historical correctness
Add a missing verb
is being
show examples
being
Wrong verb form
is
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 lost. These couple aspects can play
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
show examples
 role  not only for local viewers but
also
 if it is internationally recognized and watched with massive volume which
slow
Change the verb form
slows
show examples
 ancient lives indeed it spreads to the whole world urgently, as it is said aforesaid that papers are not powerful enough to deliver fully. Coming from the negative side of that it requires
extremely
Add an article
an extremely
show examples
 high budget for
creating
Replace the word
creation
show examples
 and not at all
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
capable of inventing real historical
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art
show examples
.     
To conclude
 with that there are my followed partly agreement concerning
TV
 shows and movies which are helpful when people feel
demand
Correct article usage
a demand
show examples
 for fulfilling historical gap.
Submitted by asqar4997 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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