IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#diagrams #show #changes #place #west #park #school #construction #information #features #comparisons
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The diagrams illustrate what changed in the construction of the West
Use synonyms
park
Correct your spelling
Park
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 Secondary
School
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 from 1950 until 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that the most significant change from 1950 to 2010 was the development of the
car
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park
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 and the new
block
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 that was added to the
school
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,
whereas
Linking Words
 the extinction of the houses and the farmland. In 1980, we can see that there was a need for
school
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 expansion, more specifically an additional
block
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 was added to the main building of the
school
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 and it is called Science
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block
Correct your spelling
Block
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, which remained the same
also
Linking Words
 in 2010. To the west of the
school
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 in 1950 there were houses but in 1980 they were replaced by the science
block
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 and a small
car
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park
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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 field was added to the place of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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farmland. In 2010, there was a need for a bigger
car
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park
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 so the
car
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park
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 expanded to the sports field and the
last
Linking Words
 one was relocated to the east taking a small part of the playground.
Submitted by dorachilleos on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words park, school, car, block with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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