IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table and chart below give information on police budget

The table and chart below give information on police budget
#information #police #budget
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table compares and contrasts the
budget
Use synonyms
 given to the police force from different
sources
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
 , the pie chart illustrates the money consumed for different sectors in the force during a 2-
year
Use synonyms
 time period from 2017 to 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, most of the income for the
budget
Use synonyms
 Came from the national government.
However
Linking Words
, the least
sources
Use synonyms
 were from grants and so on .
While
Linking Words
 the pie chart depicts that most
sources
Use synonyms
 from the
budget
Use synonyms
 were used for wages and the least was utilised for technology. On the one hand, 17.5
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 were collected from the national government for the police
budget
Use synonyms
 in 2017 , and 2018 ;
this
Linking Words
 is an increase of 2.3
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 more
Change preposition
in
show examples
2018 .
While
Linking Words
 , the local tax was the other major source that provide money for the police
budget
Use synonyms
 , and it was 91.2
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 in 2017 , and after one
year
Use synonyms
 , it has made up 11.1
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 more for the
budget
Use synonyms
 .
However
Linking Words
, the
last
Linking Words
 portion of income for the scheme came from other
sources
Use synonyms
 , which was 38
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 in the initial
year
Use synonyms
, and in the
last
Linking Words
Use synonyms
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
 it remained almost identical ( 38.5
million
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
).
On the other hand
Linking Words
, a huge sum of money from the project was utilised for the salary packages of officers ' and staff and it recorded 75% in 2017.
However
Linking Words
, after a
year
Use synonyms
 , it had a fall in their support and reached 69% in 2018. Surprisingly, buildings and transport reported the same amount of spending in both years , which was only 17% respectively. Meanwhile, technology accounted for the lowest
budget
Use synonyms
 in 2017, and it was only 8% .
However
Linking Words
 , in 2018 it had an 8% surge in the
budget
Use synonyms
 in the next
year
Use synonyms
 , which was 14%.
Submitted by varshajose345 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, last, while".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, sources, million, pounds, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • allocation
  • budgetary constraints
  • community policing
  • economic conditions
  • expenditures
  • funding allocation
  • governmental policies
  • operational efficiency
  • personnel costs
  • public safety
  • resource allocation
  • revenue sources
  • surveillance technology
  • trend analysis
  • fiscal responsibility
  • capital investments
  • public sector spending
  • crime rate
  • policy reform
  • infrastructure upgrades
  • staff training
  • emergency response capabilities
  • fiscal year
  • financial oversight
  • budget cuts
  • incremental increase
  • law enforcement agencies
What to do next:
Look at other essays: