Some countries spend a lot of money preparing competitors to take part in major competitions such as Olympic Games or football World Cup. Some people say that it would be better to spend this money encouraging children to take up sports from a young age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, citizens pay more attention
on
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to
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sports
and would like to enhance their health. Whether
should
Correct article usage
the should
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government
Add an article
the government
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spend money on the player for
the
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apply
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international competitions or should spend on
strengthen
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strengthening
show examples
youth
participation
on
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in
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sports
becomes
a
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apply
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widely
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wide
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debate. In my opinion,
government
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the government
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should
emphasis
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emphasise
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the importance of
youth's
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youth
show examples
sports
,
while
cultivating the competitors is vital. First of all, it is obvious that many children have
a
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apply
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heavy work in their academic study, which make them have less time to take part in
the
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apply
show examples
sports
. So it is vital for the government to give
a
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apply
show examples
better economical support to spur the
youth
do
Correct your spelling
to
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exercise more frequently.
Secondly
, the
youth
is the future of the country. If children could not build a strong and healthy
body
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bodies
show examples
, they would lose a foundation to achieve more in the future, which means that the future of the nation will be limited too.
Thirdly
, exercise not only can enhance
youth
physically, but
also
mentally. There
are
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is
show examples
a lot of evidence and thesis
support
Wrong verb form
supporting
show examples
that doing exercise can bring
the
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a
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healthy mental, which is
a
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apply
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key to
have
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having
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a well-being life.
However
, spending more on
the
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apply
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children's
sports
does not mean that
the
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apply
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preparing the large
competitions'
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competitions
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players are not important. Taking up
the
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apply
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large
sport
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sports
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games can
also
encourage
the
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apply
show examples
young people
be
Add the particle
to be
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involved
to
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in
show examples
the
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apply
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sports
too.
For example
, the skiing player whose name is GuAiling won
the
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a
show examples
medal in the Olympic Games, which encourage a number of young people
try
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to try
show examples
and learn to ski. What's more, it makes skiing becomes more popular. So participating the major competitions can affect the
youth
's spirit toward
to
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apply
show examples
the
sports
. In conclusion, countries should spend more
to
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apply
show examples
supporting
Wrong verb form
support
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the
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apply
show examples
young people
Fix the infinitive
to take
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take
Wrong verb form
taking
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part in
the
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apply
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sport
Change the noun form
sports
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activities,
while
it is
also
important for them to
cultivating
Change the form of the verb
cultivate
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
competitors.
Submitted by yuetongli98 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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