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Some people think that public health is the responsibility of the government, while others believe that individuals should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #health #responsibility #government #individuals
There has been much of a debate revolving around the issue regarding who is responsible for public
health
. Some assert that it is
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
show examples
 matter of concern,
whereas
 others argue that it can be
self addressed
Add a hyphen
self-addressed
show examples
. Before giving my opinion, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views will be discussed.
According to
 the prior view, the primary reason why
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should look after their population's
health
 is having access to enough funds.
This
 is to say that,
Correct article usage
the ministry
show examples
ministry
Fix the agreement mistake
ministries
show examples
 have enough money collected from various sources which they can utilize in
healthcare
Add an article
the healthcare
show examples
 sector. Take India as an example,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of the population
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 below
poverty
Correct article usage
the poverty
show examples
 line,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
 do not have spare money to look after their
health
.
As a result
, they have shorter life-span.
Moreover
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should build better hospital facilities and spread
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
 regarding regular check-ups.
In other words
, people in rural
ares
Correct your spelling
areas
 should be educated about how to take care of themselves by getting full body check-ups on regular events. Obviously, self-care is equally important owing to the fact that we know our
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
 better than anyone else. More specifically, despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
various efforts of
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
, if
self care
Add a hyphen
self-care
show examples
 is not taken properly, all the efforts are in vain.
To sum up
, having considered both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views, I believe
government
 should be more responsible for
Correct article usage
the public's
show examples
public's
Change noun form
public
show examples
health
 rather than them taking their own care.
Submitted by avimistry333 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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