IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Universities should provide students with the skills they will require to succeed at their future. How far do you agree or disagree with the above opinion. What are some of the skills that employers look for new employees?

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Most of
young
Add an article
the young
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 generation go to
university
Use synonyms
 to get
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 higher degree for preparing their future.
While
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 some people think that
university
Use synonyms
 has no relation
preparing
Change preposition
to preparing
show examples
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the workplace, some said that
Use synonyms
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 should teach
skills
Use synonyms
 that they need in
real
Add an article
the real
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 world.
This
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 essay will discuss the urgency of
Use synonyms
Add an article
the university
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university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 to
provides
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
work
Use synonyms
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
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, and the
skills
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 that interest
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the employer
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employer
Fix the agreement mistake
employers
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. As
growing
Correct article usage
a growing
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 number
Use synonyms
student
Change preposition
of student
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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pursue
Change the verb form
pursues
show examples
 higher education, the expectation of
university
Use synonyms
 to brighten their future
keep
Change the verb form
keeps
show examples
 increasing. For that reason,
Use synonyms
Add an article
the university
a university
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university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 should not only focus on the theory
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
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for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
skills
Use synonyms
 that will be beneficial for preparing
Use synonyms
work
Change preposition
for work
show examples
 life.
Whereas
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 in the most of learning process, the lecturer only keeps up with
current
Correct article usage
the current
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 theory without
elaborate
Wrong verb form
elaborating
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to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the real situation in the world.
Consequently
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, students feel no
corelation
Correct your spelling
correlation
 between what they have got in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
class and the real world. It leads them to experience culture shock of
work
Use synonyms
 life. There are some
skills
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 which will be considered by most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Add an article
the employer
show examples
employer
Fix the agreement mistake
employers
show examples
.
Firstly
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, the ability to
work
Use synonyms
 in
team
Add an article
a team
show examples
. It is because most of
Use synonyms
work
Add an article
the work
show examples
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
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 communication and
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 between one division to another. It could not be denied that ability to
work
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 in a group will be beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individual performance
as well as
Linking Words
Correct article usage
the company
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company
Change noun form
company's
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 progress.
Secondly
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, having additional hard
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 will open
wider
Correct article usage
a wider
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 chance to be accepted in a company. It is because in some cases,
task
Add an article
a task
the task
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 in the job needs multiple skill.
For instance
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, being a teacher
instead
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 of
knowledge
Add a missing verb
having knowledge
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 of teaching,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
also
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 requires creativity. When a teacher
able
Add a missing verb
is able
show examples
 to design the PPT or poster it will boost their performance
as well as
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 the
Use synonyms
student
Change noun form
student's
show examples
 understanding.
To sum up
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,
although
Linking Words
Use synonyms
university
Add an article
the university
show examples
 is an academic institution, I firmly believe that it should provide
skills
Use synonyms
 which are needed by the
student
Use synonyms
 in the
Use synonyms
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
.
Moreover
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, communication and multimedia
skills
Use synonyms
 which will be beneficial for the individual
as well as
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employee
Correct article usage
the employee
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 can be learned in the class.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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