The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relev

#information #process #drinks #summarise #report #features #comparisons #relev

The graph illustrates the entire process of manufacturing carbonated drinks, including purifying, desensitizing, adding

flavour

, packaging, and transportation.

Overall

, there are five stages before the final product is sent to supermarkets,

starts

Wrong verb form

starting

show examples

with raw material, which will be heated and blended in substance to create

flavour

and texture before being packed into different containers and shipped to destinations. First of all, raw

water

will be sent from the storage to the

water

softener through a filter, where the chemicals are involved to complete the process of

water

cleaning. Following the second stage for heating evaporation and carbonation

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

includes pumping the helf-completed products into electric heaters, later the cooling pipe will reduce the temperature of the

water

before relocating it into carbon dioxide to make carbonated

water

. In the third stage, carbonated

water

will be combined with various elements to create

flavour

, including colouring, syrup, and

flavour

. Final products will be packed into either can or bottle

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

after

Change the verb form

going

show examples

through a filter

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and be sent to supermarkets.

Submitted by unapoya0916 on Wed Apr 12 2023

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Linking words: Add more linking words.

▼

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words flavour, water with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

166 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relev

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where the did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

extinction of animals due to habitat destruction and pollutants

Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Increasing numbers of students are choosing to study abroad. To what extent does this trend benefit the students themselves and the countries involved? What are the drawbacks?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.