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Band 4

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#countries #phone #cellphone #apps #development
The method of
make
Change the verb form
making
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Add an article
the payment
a payment
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payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments
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 has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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changed in recent decades. Because of the
technology
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technological
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 developments, most
of
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apply
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people
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the people
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 choose
using
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to use
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cellphone
 apps
such
 as Alipay
instead
 of paying by credit card or cash. I believe the benefits are greater than the drawbacks There are various reasons that companies and individuals encourage paying by
cellphone
Correct your spelling
cell phone
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. If everything
paying
Wrong verb form
pays
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 for
cellphone
 apps, the cashiers will
easy
Replace the word
easily
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 manage all the payments. Before they have to accept cash or debit and credit
cand
Correct your spelling
card
show examples
. Sometimes they receive fake money from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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customers,
most
Correct word choice
and most
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 of
time
Add an article
the time
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 they take
responsibilities
Fix the agreement mistake
responsibility
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 by themselves.
That is
 the main reason
for
Change preposition
apply
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why cashiers always lack hands and
hiring
Wrong verb form
hire
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 all the
time
. Because
complicate
Wrong verb form
complicated
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 payment methods have
negative
Add an article
a negative
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 impact
for
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on
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 many business companies.
Thus
, paying for things using
mobile
Correct article usage
a mobile
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 phone is a kind of revolution in
business
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the business
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 industry
For
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As
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 individuals, we can have more benefits from paying
use
Fix the infinitive
to use
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cellphone
Fix the agreement mistake
cellphones
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. It brings us a lot of
convence
Correct your spelling
convenience
such
 as online shopping, online banking,
E-transfer
Correct word choice
and E-transfer
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. People do not need to waste
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
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waiting.
Time
 is limited,
technology
 saves us a lot of
time
 and gives us more freedom. I believe mobile phone payment is just the beginning of the
technology
, the government and the country even the world will
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 more
technology
 to support
humans
Change noun form
humans'
human's
show examples
 daily life in the future. In conclusion, I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Both the government and individuals can support
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
purchasing by mobile phone apps.
Technology
 makes our life more productive and effective.
Submitted by cyh000823 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • safety
  • security
  • time-saving
  • cashless transactions
  • dependence on technology
  • privacy concerns
  • accessibility issues
  • financial vulnerability
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