The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #park #first #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The maps provide information about the changes in the

park

arrangement from 1920 to the present day.

Overall

, apart from the two central entrances and one part of

rose

Add an article

the rose

a rose

show examples

garden, everything has

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

experienced replacement or

transform

Replace the word

transformation

show examples

in the

park

over the period.

To begin

with, in 1920, in the middle of the

park

was situated the fountain, which was superseded by a big rose garden surrounded with seat places.

Following

this

, the stage for musicians, which

sited

Add a missing verb

is sited

show examples

on the left of the fountain, was transformed and developed into a big

amphitheater

Change the spelling

amphitheatre

show examples

for concerts. In 1920, the pond for water plants was located at the right north corner of the

park

, but now water

feature

Fix the agreement mistake

features

show examples

Add a missing verb

is at

show examples

the right south corner. Another significant feature is that the

park

in 1920 had

considerable

Add an article

a considerable

show examples

amount of green zones,

such

as three rose gardens and a glasshouse,

while

the modern

park

has

less

Correct quantifier usage

fewer

show examples

green parts. It should be emphasized that now

park

Add an article

the park

show examples

has a section of entertainment,unlike a

park

in 1920, on the right side of the

park

including a cafe and children’s play area.

Moreover

, the

park

was added with a new entrance from the underground car

park

on Eldon Street.

Submitted by fgadzievaa on Fri Apr 14 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

198 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

alterations
renovations
modernize
upgraded
transformed
landscaping
facilities
amenities
preservation
heritage
green spaces
eco-friendly
public space
community impact
historical elements
conservation
recreational areas
urban planning
sustainable development
layout

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The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that traditional culture can be destroyed as money-making attractions to tourists. However, others believe that it is the only way to save traditions. Discuss both views and give you our opinion.

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do advantages of this trend outweigh disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. why might this be the case? do you think this is positive or negative development?

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?