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Band 5

The diagram below shows the process of electricity production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the process of electricity production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The figure illustrates two different types of procedures
Change preposition
by that
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 electricity is generated by hydroelectric power stations.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are similar steps between a traditional
plant
Use synonyms
 and a present hydroelectric
plant
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 which are in a
water
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-intake process and the work of a
turbine
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 machine. In the beginning, for a run-of-river
plant
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,
water
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 in the river flows downhill into a new entrance which a big tube had built for the new
plant
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 for allowing
water
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 to the turbines.
The following step is
Linking Words
 the
water
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 flow will get into the
turbine
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 machines and activate the
turbine
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 blends.  Regarding the traditional method, one
turbine
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 in the machine was turned by the
water
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 flow and the other one worked with generators. Even though the hydroelectric
plant
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 now is using the same way of
turbine
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 work, there is an outlet to let some
water
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 flow back to the river from the
turbine
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. In the final process, after the generators work, the power is made by the turbines.
Lastly
Linking Words
, it is sent to conduct electricity by transmission lines at the other station.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words plant, turbine, water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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